Monkey with a Laptop

:: Monkey with a Laptop ::

I am a genetically-augmented, highly intelligent Yellow Baboon. In 2003 I escaped from a secret military facility in New Mexico. I lifted this laptop on the way out.
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:: 4/12/2004 ::

I am currently outside of Roe, AR of all places. The wheelbarrow, while awkward to travel with, and giving me the appearance of a circus attraction, is surprisingly practical. I am able to prop it upside down at a 45 degree angle against something and provide a fair amount of shelter from the elements, and it currently can carry everything I need. If I could get my hands on a little pup tent or something it would be even better. One of those free standing things. I don't have the upper body strength to drive stakes in, though I'm getting stronger pushing around this fucking wheelbarrow.

I haven't really noticed anybody following me. I seem to have escaped from Bald Knob clean. That's good. It's been months since I've heard from The Facility...maybe I am, indeed, a free boon.

I have been a little too busy trying to survive to jack into the world via the web. So little surf time has been done. All I know is the question that has dogged me since the final augmentation operation ended a couple of years ago..."how will it all end for Ross and Rachel". My money is on them being together...simply because I think you sapes have a soft spot for a love story. It's an admirable quality.

And maybe I'm getting soft, but that's just what America needs. We know we can't sweep in and occupy a country half-way around the world. But we need to know that love conquers all. That love can survive every contrived trap that a script writer can throw at them. America needs to know what they are fighting for...pretty sapes in love. When that dust covered soldier lives another day in Iraq, knowing that he or she is fighting a ridiculous war in the name of greed, at least they can look at their copy of TV Guide and know...there is a reason for this. Ross Gellar and Rachel Green would never have survived in Iraq. We are doing this for the beautiful people.

Yes, I am being extreme. I just want Amerisapes to look away from their plasma screens for a second to see that things are not looking too good. It's not the end or anything but, get up! You're late for work!'s an extreme...but there's a section about how the government produces porn for the masses to keep them happy. Please think about it.

Gotta fly. Talk to you all soon.
:: Eric Peter Schwartz 10:49 AM [+] comment on runko's post ::
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